Sunday, 31 August 2014

Imaginary You Doesn't Wear Crop-Tops


(quick note- I started writing this about a week ago when I hadn't finished moving. Just thought I should mention for the sake of chronology!)

Hallo everyone!

I open yet again by apologising for my infrequent posts. Life has been a bit tricky lately. I'm moving to an amazing house, and I'm super excited, but it is stressful. I am currently sitting on top of a pile of my own junk in a carebear onesie mourning the loss of a can of Jack Daniels, which has seemingly been eaten up by the endless black hole of clothes and knicknacks. So instead of wistfully drinking and crying and sorting my socks, I have decided that I'm gonna get down to business on my blog.

(yeah, here's a picture for context.)

Ha! Take it away procrastiKatie (excellent play on words there)!


I like this outfit because I have my cute belly out on display. I have struggled with self image issues for years so now getting my belly or booty out is an incredibly freeing experience. Back in the day (oh, high school), I had the same size waist as my now seven year old brother, and I wore almost exclusively baggy clothes, and I was incredibly anti-social and tired all the time. I would have secret dress-ups in my room, trying on all of the things that apparently my body didn't deserve to wear in public.


Now that I am a lot healthier, I dare myself to do all the things that I once put on the back burner for the time I would magically wake up inhabiting the body that I wanted. I was chasing my own shadow, trying to meet a constantly higher standard. And I never got to meet her. Because that version of myself will never really exist. And even if she did, I don't think I'd want to know her. I have too many wonderful people to fill up my days.

 

... Like Annika! This morning we ate our weight in McDonalds hotcakes, and when she caught me counting calories she quickly jumped on my case, and started competing with me to see who could eat the most calories. My friend Billy went back and bought a second McMuffin just to take over my calorie intake. 




I would much rather fill up my life with wonderful people like Billy and Annika than with people like imaginary thin Katie. And that goes for all things. We are always setting ourselves ridiculous goals that in reality have nothing to do with bettering ourselves because they are based on a version of ourselves that doesn't exist. Imaginary you. 



Katie Wears:
White shirt- thrifted
Gingham Pants- thrifted, orignally Annika's
Pink Boots- hand-me down... from um.. Annika
Choker- bought online
M&M and Pill Earrings- from a market

Annika Wears:
Shoes- Yes Walker (shop doesn't exist anymore)
Bag- Thrifted
Socks- from a market




Content Warning-- SUPER CHEESY PART!

And yeah, you can gain weight, lose weight, dye your hair, exercise more, any of these things, if it is part of the narrative of loving yourself. And you have to start from love, because resenting the person that you 'were' is never productive. Give your poor awkward high-school self a little credit, and give your belly a comforting hug. Love what you have, and work from there.


I'll leave you with an Amanda Palmer song that I think covers all of this pretty excellently. Give it a listen and have a lovely day!

Love, Katie
xxxooo

14 comments:

  1. ;_____;
    I love you so dang much!

    Also, that picture of you in the carebare onesie is just about THE CUTEST THING IN THE WORLD.

    xxxxx

    ps is it lame that I was really excited about reading your post and jumped on a computer just after 9am so I could read it?!

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  2. Beautiful blog, as usual. You adorable thing, you. xxx i love you

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  3. I love the 'super cheesy part'- !!!! So much. Do you mind if I use that quote and link back?
    Those gingham pants and crop top is so cute on you.
    <3 Laura

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  4. on a serious note - you are absolutely beautiful, and look even more so now that you seem happy and having fun with the gorgeous Annika! You are an amazing person and i love your blog...and you look amazing in this post as you always do.
    Keep on loving life and being you - reading your posts brings a smile to my face and makes me want to laugh and smile and have as much fun as you seem to be having! All my love, Ellie xx

    http://roseandvintage.blogspot.com/

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    1. Thank you so much!!! It means so much to me xxxx👭💖👭

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  5. Absolutely wonderful post, and so well written. I've always struggled with the issue of body image, and I always have to remind myself to appreciate my body for everything it is (and not hate it for what it isn't). On a totally superficial note, you're the cutest and you have such a lovely figure, so it's inspiring to see you loving yourself :)

    xox Sammi
    www.thesoubrettebrunette.blogspot.com

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    1. Thank you Sammi! I really really appreciate it. Also as an aside your blog just got stalked and grrrl, you're damn cute too. ❤️

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  6. "I would much rather fill up my life with wonderful people like Billy and Annika than with people like imaginary thin Katie"

    This is just perfect!

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  7. I totally relate..high school-me would hide behind frumpy clothing, but played dress-up at home and never felt like she could wear those things in public. I find your journey with self-love super inspiring. Plus, you are a huge cutie <3

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  8. I'm still in highschool but, i can relate to you lol cos back in middle school years i never get dressed up when going out somewhere cause...it's really hard for accepting myself but now i just don't care about what other people think about me! it's all about our opinion about ourself lol
    Btw I have same pants like you, but not high waisted haha:3 gingham prints is the cutest pattern<3333

    Umm, Kinda oot but, i really love your hair, it's so cute and i like to seeing twintailed girl ><

    Adventure of P-Chaaaan!!!

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  9. This blog post is just what I needed right now. I've been feeling a bit down about myself lately and really need to start loving myself more. I think everything about this outfit is super cute, especially the hair, it makes me wish I had my own long locks back haha.

    Cats in Crop Tops

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  10. I kinda get this. I sometimes feel like either "that's not me" or being unsure what the response would be - even if I know it would look good on me. In general I'm not too bad, I'm adding more of what I like to my everyday closet but dressing up formal/nice can still stress me out! I'm trying to get better and not stressing myself out sewing to make my own stuff, and not have to compromise and spend more money than I should. I found this via Annika's blog/YouTube. I might even be inspired to try blogging myself...

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